Rex Tillerson thinks the American people should believe him when he says we’re safe from North Korea. That doesn’t mean they will.
Um… yeah right Rex.
There is about a zero percent chance that I won’t be fixated on and anxious over this amped up conflict with North Korea. The chances of me staying cool, calm and collected and sleeping well at night are about as good as the chances of me getting through all of my family’s daily laundry, or not having a 5 pm cocktail. I’ll be frank. North Korea’s latest threat has my mom-panties in one hell of a bunch. Although North Korean threats and promises really aren’t anything new, it has certainly been hyped up as of late and it’s bloody frightening.
And I can hear my dad in my ear now, “Let’s not jump off the cliff Kristin.” (He has held me back from my cliff of irrationality far too many times to count.) North Korea has threatened our livelihood before, so perhaps this is yet another bluff from Captain Crazypants, Kim Jung Un.
In 1994 a North Korean negotiator swore they would turn South Korea into a “Sea of Fire.”
In 2002 Pyongyang promised to “mercilessly wipe out aggressors.”
Now the North Korean Army has issues a 47 paragraph statement ending with a promise that “the tragic end of the American empire will be hastened.”
Maybe it is because this is my first experience with hearing about the North Korean threat in my adult life that makes it so damn scary. Perhaps it is because I am a mother and now everything is a little bit scary. Or maybe it is because North Korea has recently launched two intercontinental ballistic missiles designed to carry nuclear warheads capable of striking the United States mainland that has me one step away from breathing into a paper bag. On top of that terrifying development North Korea is under the leadership and regime of a bonifide lunatic. Oh yeah, Kim Jong Un is a Stage One Cuckoo and to my knowledge it is never good when crazy people tell you they are going to blow your shit up.
To make things just a tad more terrifying our President responded to the North Korean Nut-job with this statement: “North Korea best not make any more threats to the United States. They will be met with fire and fury like the world has never seen… he has been very threatening beyond a normal state. They will be met with fire, fury and frankly power the likes of which this world has never seen before.” Of course this only further angered the North Koreans who then issued a statement about their possible plans to demolish the Anderson Air force Base in Guam. Yes folks we have two unhinged, nuke-loving Nation leaders playing a game of Nuclear Ping Pong. Jesus Donald! Don’t poke the bear! Now we really can’t sit back tweeting and twiddling our thumbs while the North Koreans are testing out their weapons of mass destruction and making statements about blowing us all up to smithereens now can we? No we can not. The answer is definitely not sit back and wait to be incinerated if threats are indeed advancing, but can we maybe take a breath and think about what statements to release to the world before spewing forth whatever madness comes to mind? Just this once please can we issue a well thought out statement on behalf of our country, it’s people and it’s leader?
Think before you speak.
Think before you tweet.
Or just plain old think, tough guy!
The very worst part of this whole fiasco (aside from a possible impending nuclear war) is that President Trump’s statement was supposedly improvised. He did appear to be reading something from a sheet of paper laid before him during a recent briefing, but according to close sources the sheet of paper had bullet points regarding the Opiate crisis, which was what he was supposed to be commenting on. Following the slew of back and forth terrorizing statements by both Kim Jung Un and Trump, Tillerson did his best (I guess) to try and downplay the threats and muffle the rising fear rippling through the general public (hi that is me!) Sleep tight tonight I will not Rex and I probably won’t rest easy for the next three and a half years.